What rights do I have as an abused person in a relationship?

The law provides special protections for persons who are abused by a "past or present spouse, persons who are parents of the same child, parent and children, stepparent and stepchildren, foster parent and foster children, or other person living or formerly living in the same household."

Clearly, this casts a pretty wide net, encompassing close relatives, present and former partners, and even present and past roommates. Any person (adult or child) abused by someone fitting this criteria has the right to seek an order of protection in Superior Court preventing future unwanted contact?

Do I have to face my abuser in court?

The short answer is "yes" . . . eventually. After you fill out the initial paperwork, you will see the judge to determine if your application will be granted on an "ex parte" basis. This means that the judge will grant, or not, your application without your abuser knowing you are doing so or being present. However, after the Ex Parte Order is granted, your abuser will be served with a copy of the order and a notice to appear for a "final" hearing held within ten (10) and thirty (30) days of the Ex Parte Order being signed.

What happens if I am living with my abuser, when I apply for a protective order?

This is the most obvious scenario to obtain a protective order. Even in the initial Ex Parte Order, the judge has the authority to pass on a number of issues, aside from the order of protection. For instance, the judge can order you to have sole custody of any children you might share, payment of child support or alimony, possession of homes, bank accounts, or cars, payment of any debts or loans, just about anything you might need to ensure not just your physical protection, but also your financial protection. What you would do, then, is get to a safe place, obtain the Ex Parte Order, and have law enforcement accompany you back to your home, when you abuser would be served with the order and told by law enforcement to immediately vacate the residence.

What do I have to do to start the process?

The first step is to file an application for the protective order. There are court approved forms available to do so. You need to have the abuser’s personal information (including items like cars, place of employment, and places of residence). The forms are filled out with you describing all past acts of violence and why you are seeking the protective order. You can obtain the assistance of certain community groups and the battered women’s shelter in drafting the initial petition and other paperwork; or, you can hire an attorney to do this for you.

Do I need to have a witness to obtain a protective order?

It is always advisable to have a witness, or other corroborating evidence, to support your allegations in court, but it is not absolutely necessary to do so. It would be certainly helpful to be able to call a witness in court who was a police officer, about a prior report you have made; or a friend or family member who observed injuries or damaged property; or a witness to prior threats made by the batterer. It would also be helpful to have pictures, written statements, or tape recordings to support your claims. Another helpful witness would be someone previously abused by the same batterer.

What does a family protective order do for me?

A protective order enhances law enforcement’s authority to arrest your abuser; it is entered into a state-wide database providing instant access to anyone with clearance to do so and learn of your right to have your abuser immediately arrested.

Ordinarily, if you go to the store, and someone is there with whom you don’t want to have any contact, this probably does not break any law. Even if it did, law enforcement will have no authority to arrest your abuser. But, with the family violence protective order, something as innocuous as a letter, e-mail, or phone call, will trigger law enforcement’s authority to arrest your abuser, without needing an arrest warrant and without first having to go to a judge.

Thus, a family violence protective order is even more powerful than if your abuser is on probation, and ordered to stay away from you or out on bond. For this reason, even if you are pursuing criminal charges against your abuser, it is advisable to also seek a protective order.

How recent does the abuse need to be?

There is no formula for how recent the abuse has to be to sustain a request for a protective order. For instance, you might not have seen your abuser for many years, thinking that the past had been put behind you, and you were contacted by him or her, out of the blue. If the abuse was serious enough in the past, just this unsolicited contact might be enough to satisfy a judge that you "may" suffer abuse in the future, and grant your request for a protective order.

What types of abuse do I have to show to obtain an order of protection?

Family violence protection may be obtained where you can show that you are a victim of any felony or any "battery, simple battery, simple assault, assault, stalking, criminal damage to property, unlawful restraint, or criminal trespass," committed by a person qualified as a "family" member, as broadly defined.

The petitioner has to allege "with specific facts that probable cause exists to establish that family violence has occurred in the past and may occur in the future." The term "probable cause" is not specifically defined by statute, but it commonly refers to the standard for authorizing law enforcement to arrest someone or for an arrest warrant to be issued. This is a fairly low standard, as it requires only proof of some facts to justify the conclusion that one of these acts were committed.